Just out of reach

7:35am, 10/17/14: The first time Evelyn (10.5 years old) justified the length of her skirt with the fingertip rule.


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Mortality and Banana Bread

Baking banana bread with Calvin. “I love you, Mommy. [beat] I don’t want you to die.”

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Calvin: “Tomorrow is a school day?”
Calvin, holding up two fingers: “Two stay home days is *sad*. Three stay home days is happy” (putting up three fingers).
“Why is two sad and three happy?”
Calvin: “Because when you have TWO stay home days, it makes you want another stay home day.”

I know everything from the muses to the fates to the one eyed

Offensive Drawings by a 3 1/2 year old

Calvin: “I’m going to send Grandma one of these pictures. I’m not going to send her one of my butt pictures. Or my fart pictures.”
Me: “Good, because I don’t think she would like those.”
Calvin: “Yeah. I’ll send them to someone who likes them. Like me.”

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Charlotte: “Where did the toy squid go?”
“I don’t know. Why don’t you use your fingers under the water to find it?”
Charlotte:”These are flippers. We’re whales. Humpback whales.”

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Eye of the Beholder

Girls and I talking about beauty and age.
“Do you think I’m pretty?” I ask.
Charlotte, rushing toward me to hug me: “You’re pretty enough for me!” Then, whispering, “…but you need to dye your hair again.”
Evelyn: “I think you’re really pretty for someone your age.”

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Green Pants

Evelyn: “which one of you is going to my open house tonight at school?”
James: “Me. I’m looking forward to meeting your teacher.”
Evelyn, pausing: “Are you going to wear those green pants?”
James and I burst out laughing. Me: “Evelyn, are you embarrassed by your dad’s pants?”
Evelyn, rolling her eyes: “Yes.”
James: “I am going to wear these pants. And maybe I’ll even let [your teacher] know where he can buy a pair himself.”

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